Calumet Page 4
thinking of how her family would treat Margot made her
stomach churn.
“You okay?” Margot lifted her head and ran her fingers
though Jaxon’s hair.
“Perfect.” There’d come a day when she’d have to sit
Margot down and tell her the truth of where she’d come
from. The most important part of that story was why she’d
run and why she didn’t want to go back. There was nothing
left for her in Louisiana, but keeping things from Margot
carried its own set of risks.
“That you are, my love.”
* * *
Iris waited in the office of the high school, finishing her
paperwork for the day. The busywork helped her get her
mind off what was coming. It had nothing to do with
reunions or a marriage that was getting ready to take some
hits as the reunion neared. No, her daughter was a junior
who was counting the days until she graduated and gained
her freedom. That bothered her, but nothing she did or said
persuaded Sean from wanting to fly away and not come
back. That wasn’t a surprise, but it was why Sean wanted to
go that made Iris feel shame.
Her son walked into the office. “Hey, Mom,” Danny said,
louder than necessary.
“Hey, you don’t have to shout.” She closed the image
she’d been staring at on her computer. Margot Drake was
hanging on to Jaxon like she’d fall off the spike heels she
was wearing without the support, but even with that Jaxon
was taller and still looked good. There was no way she’d
ever call Jaxon, but peeking in on her life every so often was
okay. At least, that’s what she told herself.
“I’ve been calling you for, like, an hour,” Danny said in
his overexaggerated way. “What the heck are you doing? Is
it the math test for that asshole I have this year?”
“What have we said about you cursing? I know you’re
going to do it, but I’d appreciate not listening to it all day
long.” She powered down her computer and opened the
bottom drawer of her desk to get her purse. “The one thing
I’ve noticed is that the teacher is only an asshole when you
don’t study and aren’t doing well. We’ve talked about that
too.”
“Come on, Mom. That guy has it in for me, and if he
keeps slamming me, he’s going to tank my chances of
staying on the team.” His voice was starting to rise again,
and she pointed at him. “Okay, I’ll study.”
“Good.” She kissed his cheek. “Where’s your sister?”
“She was in the library the last time I passed by there.
You should bring her to some head doctor and get her fixed.
All she does is study and work out. That’s not normal.”
“I hate to break it to you, but there’s nothing crazy about
that. You should try to cut back on hanging with your friends
and having a good time, so you can get to know math
better.” She put her hand up when he started to disagree.
“Stop talking before I ground you, and math will be the least
of your problems.”
“It’s not like I’m going to college. Going to the police
academy here doesn’t require that.” He was tall, thick, and
blond like his father. That physique made him the perfect
football quarterback and catcher on the baseball team.
Danny was also his father when it came to what his future
should be.
“What if you get a scholarship to play somewhere? Would
you blow that off?” It was like talking to a brick wall, but she
had plenty of practice with his father. Daniel had been a star
in high school, and he still talked about the glory days.
She’d married Daniel when he’d asked, and she’d paid
the price for saying yes. He’d blamed her for a long time for
everything he’d given up. Her pregnancy had forced him to
pass on the scholarship he’d been expecting to a university
in north Louisiana. That offer was a figment of his
imagination, but that hadn’t been important. His star power
hadn’t been enough to get him to the next level, and
somehow that had been her fault.
He’d asked for her hand, and she’d agreed for her own
reasons. She’d never asked him to give up a damn thing,
and nothing she’d done since had made Daniel stop talking
about his glory days. Her rational brain was convinced he’d
married her to prove he’d won against the one person in
high school he hated above all others. It wasn’t the romance
written about in books, but it wasn’t bad enough to walk
away from.
“You think I can?” Danny pushed his hair back with
impatience, and she smiled. That move reminded her of
Jaxon when she’d finished practice and wanted a shower.
Her son had gone out for the JV football team, and his hard
work had paid off when they’d put him in at quarterback.
His season so far had been pretty good, and he had two
wins as a starter.
“If you keep those grades up and don’t get hurt, I’m sure
you can. Instead of making fun of your sister, maybe you
should ask her to help you with math. She had the teacher
you don’t like two years ago, so I’m sure she’ll be happy to
get you back on track.” They walked down the deserted
hallway and stopped at the library. Sean had her head down,
and she was bouncing the eraser of her pencil on her
notebook.
Iris knew it was her way of concentrating, and it never
failed to bring her a level of happiness that was hard to
describe. Sean was as different from Danny as two siblings
could be, and while she loved them both, her daughter was
a gift. “Hey, you ready?”
Sean glanced up but didn’t smile. “Sorry, I was trying to
finish my paper before the weekend.” The books scattered
on the table were jammed in the bag Sean had carried
around for three years, and she stood. It never made Danny
happy when his sister stood next to him and showed that
she was three inches taller. They were like night and day in
appearance, and over the years, that had triggered a lot of
gossip.
“Do you guys want to go out to eat? Your dad is working
tonight, and it’s already after five.” They walked out, and
the guys playing outside yelled at Danny. It didn’t take long
for him to ask if he could go with his friends, and she
handed him a twenty and waved, then turned to Sean.
“What are you in the mood for?”
Sean didn’t answer and got in the car. The silent
treatment had started that summer and nothing she’d tried
had broken through. She had to give it to Sean for her
mental toughness. Taking a chance, she drove to the Italian
place in the next town. They sat across from each other, and
the only words Sean spoke were to order. Then she leaned
back and crossed her arms over her chest.
“How was school today?”
“Fine,” Sean said, and that was it. It wasn’t exactly rude,
but it wasn’t a conversation. r />
“If there’s something bothering you, there’s no way I can
help you if you don’t tell me what it is.” She put her hand on
the table but didn’t reach for Sean, not wanting to be
rebuffed again.
Sean stared at her and shook her head. “Tell me about
her?”
“Who?” Iris knew exactly who, but she didn’t want to talk
about it.
“Please,” Sean said with absolute teenage sarcasm. “It’s
like you think I’m clueless. Not to mention deaf and dumb.”
During the summer Sean had found a box of her old
things and had gone through it. The pictures she’d stared at
for hours made the questions start pouring out, but Iris
didn’t want to answer them.
“I don’t think that at all, but just like you don’t tell me
everything about you, there are things I’d like to keep
private. It’s nothing sinister, but sometimes memories are
best kept buried.” She didn’t raise her voice, and she tried
not to show too much emotion.
“Whatever,” Sean said, rolling her eyes.
Iris sighed and had an urge to go home and close her
bedroom door. Purging all this crap out of her head was the
best solution, and to avoid this in the future she’d have to
commit to letting go. Her family and the life she’d built were
more important than something that was never going to be
anything other than what looped in her mind like an
unwanted old movie.
“It’s more than whatever, Sean, but I can’t talk about it. I
know you think I’m trying to put you off, but I really can’t.”
The tears that were ready to fall seemed to move something
in Sean to back off, and she finally lost her angry
expression.
“Forget about it, and please don’t cry.” Sean reached
across the table and touched her hand. It was the first time
in weeks Sean had made a move like that.
“Thank you, and I promise we’ll have the talk you want.
Only not today.” It was ridiculous, really, but her hometown
was all she knew. There was a place for her there, both
socially and figuratively. She’d made that place by keeping
her head down and fitting in when all she really wanted to
do was shout from the rooftops what was in her soul. Doing
that would come at a cost, even now. It was a price she
wasn’t capable of paying.
CHAPTER THREE
The invitation sat in Jaxon’s office drawer for the next week,
and the only one who wanted to talk about it was Bert. He’d
been hounding her for days to get her to agree to join him.
Why in the world he wanted to go back to a place that didn’t
hold many happy memories, especially for him, was a
mystery, but he wanted to go. She had a short window of
time before he told Margot about it, and then she’d have
nowhere to hide.
Margot was curious about her childhood and asked about
it all the time. It wasn’t something she liked talking about.
Her family was like every other Southern family, full of
people others liked to call eccentric. Behavioral sciences
had other names for it, and there was extensive research on
each condition that stemmed from one form of mental
instability or another. The last time her family had gotten
together in Orange Beach, Alabama, for a reunion about
twelve years ago, they’d spent the whole time whispering to
one another. That stopped whenever she walked into any
room, but she hadn’t said anything, surprised she’d been
invited at all.
Yep, there’d been some big secret they weren’t sharing
with her, and that was fine. She didn’t need a crystal ball to
guess what it was. It was no secret she was gay and was
going to hell faster than adulterous Satan worshippers. That
long weekend was enough to drive her to alcohol, and she’d
still be drunk in a ditch right now if she hadn’t possessed
stronger willpower than the average bear. The most
ridiculous thing was that she’d gone in the first place, but
it’d been her family. In her heart they deserved another
chance to get it right, and it wasn’t a total shock they’d
failed in spectacular fashion.
The only person she missed was her brother, Roy. Their
late nights talking while sitting in the large oak in their yard
helped her forget her mother’s constant disapproval. Even
he, though, had been quiet that last time they’d been
together—not that he’d engaged in the whispered
conversations, but something was different. Not even Bert
had shed any light on why that could be when he went back
for regular visits to see his parents.
“Dr. Lavigne?” The young woman standing in front of her
appeared worried. “Are you okay?”
“Sorry, did you say something?” Great, that’s all she
needed. Blanking out at work because she was thinking of
things not worth remembering was just fantastic.
“I was wondering if you knew the book we’re reading
next?”
I’m teaching the fucking class, so yes, I do. It was the
way she wanted to answer sometimes, but the kids
appeared so earnest she didn’t have the heart. Asking
questions like that was their way of breaking the ice with
her, so she grinned and Ctrl+Alt+Deleted her brain to
reboot it. Now wasn’t the time to worry about what her
family thought. “Stop by my office, and pick up the reading
list. Ask my assistant for it, and she’ll be happy to get you
up to speed. The essay on that first book is due soon, so
don’t take too long.”
“Want to grab a coffee and talk about it?” This young
woman was something else. She was gorgeous and had the
body to match.
“I only see students during office hours, sorry.” Her
phone rang, saving her from any more of this innocent
flirting. She answered with, “Hey, gorgeous,” waving as the
student left, looking disappointed.
“And you wonder why I love you so much. You always
make me smile when you answer the phone,” Margot said.
“Are you busy?”
“Not at the moment. I was walking to class, so I can sit
and start writing up my tests.” Her worries evaporated at
the sound of Margot’s voice. For once in her life she’d gotten
it right by taking a chance. Margot was the real deal when it
came to returning her love.
“Does that mean all the cute girls on campus who are
suddenly in love with English are trying to trade certain
favors for a good grade?” Margot was kidding, but there was
that slight edge to her voice.
“You were the only one who offered that, darlin’, but you
should be proud—you got that grade all on your own.” She
laughed at the memory of Margot trying the same thing,
only she’d been much more persistent. It was the only time
in her teaching career that she’d gone home hard, wet, and
extremely horny. Margot’s office visits were an exercise in
temptation. br />
“That’s the only reason I don’t handcuff myself to you
every morning when you leave for work. Now that I know
how to make you sweat, you can admit you were tempted.”
She could imagine the smile on Margot’s face. “Is there a
person alive who wouldn’t be tempted? You are, my love,
the one woman who fuels my dreams, not to mention my
desires. I thought that even when it was inappropriate for
me to even contemplate it.”
“Good comeback, baby. Listen, I’m due on set soon, but
Mama called and invited us for dinner.” She heard Margot
snap her fingers. “Don’t spend the rest of the day trying to
think up reasons you can’t go.”
Margot’s parents had a lot in common with her own, only
they were accepting of what they had and who their
daughter was. They were also completely crazy. “Would I do
that?”
“Yes,” Margot said with no hesitation. “I know you, Dr.
Lavigne, and you have to realize Daddy doesn’t really want
to kill you.” Margot laughed, and she had to join in.
“He has a funny way of showing that, and we’ll talk about
this later. There’s a few students waiting for me.” She
waved to the group headed into the classroom.
“Oh no, we’ll talk about it now. Repeat these words,”
Margot ordered. “I will be at dinner tonight.”
“I will be at dinner tonight.”
“That didn’t sound very convincing, but I’ll take it.”
Still smiling, she sat with her students and talked about a
slew of different topics that didn’t all have to do with class.
These guys had been in her classes from freshman year,
and most of them were headed to law school after this. It
was a pleasant afternoon until she glanced up and saw Bert
waiting on her again.
“Unequivocally no.”
“Unequivocally? That’s harsh. You just have to sort out
your feelings, and you’ll be fine.” Bert softened his voice,
trying a new tactic. He cocked his head to the side and
seemed to be trying to appear sympathetic.
She took a deep breath, not wanting to pop his bubble,
and jammed her papers in her bag. “You think that’s my
hang-up? If I haven’t been perfectly clear, I just don’t want
to go. Besides, it makes no sense. It’s a fifteen-year reunion
happening sixteen years after the fact.”
“They actually had the first five-year reunion at year six,